In fact, everything I tried just seemed to make things
worse. I tried to cook dinner, to show I could be domestic,
but it burned, and he had a shouting match with the smoke
detector. I organised a trip to the beach, to show I could be fun,
but a bird messed up his boating jacket, and he insisted we go
home. I tried to say “I love you”, to show that I’d always be here,
but he was already gone.